School is here

School has begun and it turns out that all my wildest fears have yet to come to fruition.  The girls haven't gotten in a bus wreck or disappeared on the way to school.  They haven't been lost and crying for mama in the hall ways on the way to class, or been bullied by older students.  The gym teacher hasn't humiliated either of them and the other kids haven't teased them about slow.  No one has had to run the mile yet.  Their friends seem to be kind and not back stabbing thus far, and no one has learned a new curse word or been taught the birds and the bees by their peers......yet.  There have been no school shootings and no one has tried to sell or give them drugs (that I know of at least).  They haven't starved to death between breakfast and lunch and they come home happy and excited to go back.  Last week when Alex and I were butting heads she even said "I wish I was at school right now"  which stabbed me to the core and simultaneously made me happy that she was enjoying it so much.
       A friend asked the girls if they were excited to start school while I was busy elsewhere.  Alex responded "yeah, but my Mom is REALLY excited. She is way more excited than me." I was so nervous that the kids would be nervous that I must have gone overboard with my fake enthusiasm.  I've been a bit crazy, it's true.  Sad that we arn't homeschooling, but glad that they girls will be gone and not fighting each other for at least 6 hours of the day.  But ohhhh 6 hours!  That's so long to be away from my darlings!
   The first day I was a ball of nerves.  Alex had to ride the bus alone because I had to take Heidi in an hour later for Kindergarten orientation.  She was thrilled that Heidi wouldn't be tagging along and it went off without a hitch.  I took Heidi and she went just fine as well.  At home I had to keep busy so I wouldn't think about it and when we picked them up from the bus they were so excited to tell us everything and hug and snuggle and play.  The time flew by until bedtime and it was the next morning when they both got on the bus that I cried, and cried. And cried.
But now we are in some sort of routine, and ohh routines are so nice!  I get up at 6:30 and make breakfast (no cereal for these kids because it goes straight through them) then wake them up and we have family breakfast at 7.  After that it's clothes (that have been laid out the night before) and hair, checking folders and putting lunch in backpacks (also made the night before).  We do scriptures and prayer and then it's usually time to head to the bus stop.  A little boy from Heidi's kindergarten class catches the bus at the same stop, just us and him, and they choose to sit by each other on the bus as well.  He is a sweet kid.  Quinn always comes with me and everyday she gets mad that she can't get on the bus as well.  Tommy stays home with Daddy who doesn't start work until the beginning of October.  The rest of the day thus far has been catching up on things.  Meal plans, groceries, house cleaning, weeding etc. It's amazing how that can really fill a day! Today Quinn and I had a great chunk of quality time while Tommy napped, and yesterday Tyler and I got in a quick date and played RISK while both the littles napped.  Quinn and I hang out at the bus stop and then she attacks her sisters with hugs and Alex carries her home.  Then it's more chaos until everyone is asleep.  I haven't mastered this time of the day yet and I'm really hoping things get better fast.  Tommy wakes up right when the girls get home and needs to be fed, Quinn wants everyone's attention and is willing to fight and bite for it, Alex and Heidi both want to tell me every exciting thing that happened during the day at the same time, and within 30 seconds there are backpacks and lunch boxes littering the floor and chaos in the home.  Snack time and reading through school folders is mixed with sisters fighting and then I'm getting dinner ready and packing lunch for the next day while trying to keep everyone from ripping each other apart while they rough house and "play" with each other.  Dinner then homework, family reading time if we can manage, scriptures and prayer and then a good 30 minutes of cuddle time per kid because these guys just HAVE to dump every detail of their day on me or else its tears at bed and tears the next morning.  I don't know how I'm going to juggle it all once Tyler starts work- guaranteed not to ever be around for bedtime.  I'm in panicked survival mode from 3:52 when they walk off the bus until 9pm when all the kids are in bed and quiet, if i'm lucky.  Today we threw in swimming lessons for 3 kids and it nearly killed me, that was with Tyler's help.  I hate that I only have 3 hours with my kids, to split between the 2 of them but really the 4 of them, with dinner and dishes and homework competing with it all.  I'm doing better at being a kind happy mom to everyone because I must, there isn't a second I can spare for an unkind word or frustrating moment because they get so few.
      Heidi started loving school but now each day she complains that it's just too long.  I feel her pain and wish so much that it was half day kindergarten, but I try to smile and convince her that she loves it. Alex enjoys school but says "I spend all day having to be nice and sit still and be quiet, when I come home I'm grumpy and tired of being kind."  She is.  So we are trying coloring therapy and I've printed off a pile of intricate coloring pages that completely engross Alex and help her calm down after a day at school.  She loves it and Heidi and Quinn can pester each other in peace.
         Tyler has been helping cut firewood for an older man in the ward who heats his house with wood all winter.  He has also been helping me out with some projects.  He took my list of monthly jobs that I'd split up week by week (split up so I wouldn't have to do them all at once) and did them all in a few hours of hard work.  I'm trying not to rely on him so I can still function when he starts work, but it's so nice having him around to chat with and lend a hand.
   I've been called as Enrichment leader in our new ward, and Tyler is in the Young Mens Presidency,  I don't quite know what this means for our family yet.
      I'm enjoying the time during the day to complete tasks of my choosing and not having to referee the big girls every minute.  There at the end of summer they were at each other's throats every second of the day.  I used to wonder what Mom's who don't homeschool do with their days, and now I see that the days are always filled whether you are teaching your kids and neglecting yourself and house, or if your kids are at school and you are taking care of the home.  I'm enjoying the schedule, but missing the complete freedom.  I'm also afraid of straying too far from school in case there is an earthquake or nuclear bomb crisis and I need to walk to the school to rescue my kids.  I've got issues.
     The mornings have started to get chilly and we've had some rainy days to prepare us for fall.  I'm starting to feel the urgency to be outside when it's sunny, even if there is plenty to do inside, because I know the sun won't be around much longer.  As wonderful as this summer was with everything coming together at once... I'm a bit afraid of the downswing that will happen once Tyler, the warm weather, and the sun all disappear at once. But having 1/4 of the living room be windows has got to help a bit- I'm hoping.  We are without a doubt going to be investing in a happy lamp this year.
     No pictures this go around.